it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
