Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
