Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(206): View more from Washington

On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...

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(224): View more from Illinois

I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.

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(636): View more from Missouri

ra ra ra ah ah

(573): View more from Missouri

wtf?

(636): View more from Missouri

sexting lady gaga style

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(208): View more from Idaho

Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly

(1-208): View more from Idaho

What is a GED?

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(618): View more from Illinois

i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...

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(406): View more from Montana

I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

How's dating the med student working out for you?

(715): View more from Wisconsin

After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.

(414): View more from Wisconsin

A true anatomy project.

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(218): View more from Minnesota

Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.

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