i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
