So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
