try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
