"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Girls should come with a carfax report
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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