Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
It's shark week go big or go home
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
