I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
NoShamevember. You game?
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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