im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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