Got a toothbrush?
I wish my penis had an off switch
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
