I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
COCAINE IS GR8
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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