The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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