I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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