she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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