I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
