And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize