so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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