Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
