no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
