it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Randomize
