If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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