you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize