I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
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