No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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