I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
