sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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