it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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