I don't think brook has ever known best
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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