the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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