Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
What a dumb baby whore.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
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