He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize