I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Never joke about your clitoris.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
