my soul wont recognize me after tonight
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Watching her eat just hurts me
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Randomize
