You smell like stripper and shame
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
