dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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