Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Randomize
