I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Randomize
