you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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