I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
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