white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
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