he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
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