in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Who put my cat in the fridge?
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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