Please don't use social media to get back at me.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
