Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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