It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I am never drinking with the goths again.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
