We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
