We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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