Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Panties = found
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
