everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
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